


The HandJob

by chukipye



Series: Borderlands AU [2]
Category: Borderlands, Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, mostly the first two
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-27
Updated: 2016-10-27
Packaged: 2018-08-27 06:56:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8391643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chukipye/pseuds/chukipye
Summary: The story of Bokuto's robotic arm and how he lost the original





	

**Author's Note:**

> Bokuto (as a mechromancer) has a robotic arm. It helps him summon Gahool (his robo-owl friend death machine) and look like a badass. This is how he lost the original.

To be perfectly honest, Kuroo was surprised they had even made it this far. The mission seemed easy enough, simply go get a package from the Amazons for Oikawa (which turned out to be an incredible amount of instant-health vials) and bring it back. What was unexpected was that the Amazons proceeding to release all of their…. ‘husbands’, to keep them from leaving. Well, more specifically to keep Bokuto from leaving.

“God damn bro, do you HAVE to be so incredibly attractive?” Kuroo complained as he slashed down another psycho. Bokuto snickered as his robotic owl, Gahool, dove down and skewered another enemy.

“I can’t help it man. Chicks dig the owl look.” He shot Kuroo some finger guns and a cocky grin. There was suddenly a loud bang and the two froze, heads turning simultaneously towards the large door that was rumbling.

“….what’s the plan?” Bokuto asked nervously, standing up from behind his cover and backing up slowly. Kuroo gripped his sword tighter, preparing for whatever comes in.

“The usual. Kill stuff. Grab loot. Run like hell and hope Tsukki and Akaashi don’t kill us for being late.” The door burst open and Kuroo immediately realized the plan wouldn’t work at all. In fact, they should’ve been running from the start.

“BADASS!” Bokuto screeched, grabbing one of his grenades and tossing it at the gigantic man who had ran through the door. The grenade landed and immediately burst into flames. The badass growled, more annoyed than hurt, and kept charging. Kuroo dashed forward, tapping a button on his belt to send a fake, then rolling under the badass’ legs to stab at him from behind when it fell for the fake clone. Usually this move would kill the enemy. But the badass wasn’t so easy to take down. Kuroo’s eyes widened as he was grabbed (damn this thing had giant hands) and tossed easily, flying over Bokuto’s head and into a wall. He landed with a grunt, his shield taking most of the damage.

“Kuroo!” Bokuto immediately turned from Kuroo back to the badass, his grin turning into a scowl as he began firing at the badass. Gahool flew over to Kuroo, flying worried circles around his head.

“I-I’m fine Gahool.” He stood up, shaking his head slightly. The world was only slightly tilting. At most he probably had a concussion, which was easy enough to fix. He glanced back up at the battle. 

“Analysis complete. Badass Goliath confirmed.” Gahool suddenly chirped. Kuroo’s eyes widened and he immediately began running back to the battle.

“BO! DO NOT SHOOT THE HEL-“His warning came too late as Bokuto aimed and took the would-be fatal shot. The Badass’ helmet flew off and Bokuto’s eyes widened as the familiar sign of a Goliath appeared: the weird small head that usually the two would laugh at. But that was usually when they were out in the open, with Akaashi and Tsukishima and a lot more enemies for the goliath to focus on. But here it was the two of them and unfortunately, Bokuto was the closest target. Everything seemed to go in slow motion. The Goliath let out a loud roar, causing both Bokuto and Kuroo to wince and cover their ears. Bokuto realized his mistake too late as he was backhanded and sent flying. Kuroo was about to charge in when he heard the scream. His eyes widened and he followed Bokuto’s trajectory. Bokuto was curled up in the floor, one hand in his hair and holding tight while the other….  
Oh god the other arm. Kuroo wasn’t sure what was worse. Bokuto’s screaming, or the sight of his arm. It turned out, the Goliath managed to send Bokuto flying into a corrosive barrel. It must’ve been weakened already because it had burst and the contents were all over Bokuto’s left arm. The smell of boiling flesh filled the room and Kuroo had never been more grateful for the mask he wore.

“A-AH FUCK” Bokuto was sobbing, doing his best to not grab his injured arm and spread the corrosive gel anywhere else. Kuroo quickly ran at the Goliath, swiftly decapitating it before it could do any more damage. He hurried to Bokuto, kneeling next to him. 

“Bo…you gotta sit still. Lemme see it Bo.” It took some effort for Kuroo to pin Bokuto down but he finally managed to get the injured man to stop moving so he could properly see his arm. It wasn’t a pretty sight. Kuroo winced, knowing the pain must be unbearable. 

“B-Bro…B-Bro it hurts so bad.” Bokuto was breathing rapidly, eyes wide. Kuroo bit his lip. There wasn’t a “someone-got-hurt” plan. Not one for a situation like this.

“I-I know it does man. We’ll figure something out. W-We can use the medicine vials we got from the Amazons.” He set down the duffel bag and opened it. Bokuto’s good arm grabbed his wrist and Kuroo paused, looking down at him.

“R-Remember that experiment Oikawa was doing…. O-On corrosive weapons? K-Kiyoko was helping too. They figured out that those d-don’t work on those wounds.” Kuroo swore under his breath. Fuck Oikawa and his fucking science experiments, proving that miracles don’t always work. Bokuto chuckled weakly and Kuroo realized he said his thought out loud.

“I got an idea….and you aren’t gonna like it.” Bokuto took a deep, shaky breath. Gahool perched on his head, obviously worried.

“I want you to cut it off.” Kuroo’s eyes went wide and if he had been drinking anything it would’ve been comically spat out.

“H-Hold up you want WHAT?!” He sputtered. Bokuto looked calmer than he had been previously.

“I want you to cut my arm off Kuroo.” He said, perfectly serious. Kuroo sighed.

“I was afraid you said that. Dude, I think shock is setting in. We’ll just go back to Sanctuary, Oikawa will fix you up, and everything will be fine-“ 

“It WON’T be fine, Tetsu! My arm is fucked up. It’s either get rid of it now or later and frankly I trust you a hell of a lot more than Oikawa. Dude, just cut it off, we use one of those medicinal vials to heal up the wound so I don’t bleed out and we go home.” Okay the plan was completely insane. Kuroo hated to admit that he did have a point though. Oikawa would easily just amputate the arm as well. But still… He took a deep breath and grabbed his sword from where he dropped it, grateful he always kept it sharp.

“This is gonna hurt Bo.” That was the only warning he got before Kuroo sliced downwards.  
_____________________________________________________________________________________________

“What the FUCK do you mean we aren’t getting the full payment?!” Kuroo growled, hand on the handle of his sword, prepared to unsheathe it. Oikawa folded his arms. They were sitting in Oikawa’s office, Bokuto sitting on the patient’s bench and swinging his legs, and the duffel bag of medicinal vials lying on the ground.

“I mean you aren’t getting the full payment. You didn’t bring all of the vials I asked for.” Oikawa replied coolly, narrowing his eyes when he saw Kuroo’s hand twitch.

“Bokuto literally gave up his god damn arm for you, and you won’t give us the full payment?” Kuroo snarled. Oikawa sighed and snapped his fingers. His ‘assistant’, Iwaizumi, moved towards the group from his position against the wall.

“You know I hate violence Kuroo-chan. I especially hate violence in my office during a proper business transaction. Now if you had brought his arm BACK so I could examine it that would’ve been a different story.” Oikawa mused, getting lost in thoughts of his experiments. Iwaizumi sighed and smacked him upside the head.

“What Shittykawa means is he appreciates the sacrifice and will help Bokuto rebuild an arm if he needs it in exchange for the full payment.” Oikawa pouted but one look changed his look into one of resignation. Kuroo scowled, still not happy but Bokuto stood up with a grin.

“Yo seriously?! We can make a super badass arm with a doc helping! I gotta tell Noya. Kuroo, let’s just go. You know there’s no negotiating with them. Of course, I’m sure Keiji will be back to….discuss this.” Oikawa and Iwaizumi both paled as Bokuto placed his arm around Kuroo’s shoulder and led him out the door.

“….Keiji and Kei are going to kill us when they find out.” Kuroo suddenly realized.

“Kill you when we find out wha- hOLY SHIT KOUTAROU.” Both men flinched as the aforementioned boyfriends turned the corner and spotted them. 

“Keeeiiji~” Bokuto immediately ran for a one-armed hug. Akaashi just stood there, blinking and shocked.

“Y-You….arm….what?” He stammered. Tsukishima stared before turning to Kuroo, eyes blazing.

“Tetsurou.” Kuroo winced at the way his name was said.

“I….can explain….”  
______________________________________________________________________________________________

Bokuto laughed as Kuroo finished the story, taking another sip of beer.

“So you’re telling me, the reason Bokuto has a robotic arm is because Oikawa was too lazy to go get his own package from the Amazons.” Tanaka snorted. He, as well as Nishinoya, had joined the two for drinks at the bar since Tanaka finally had a break from work.

“Pretty much. And because Bokuto’s incredible attractiveness caused them to all spontaneously spawn lady-boners and refuse to let us leave.” Kuroo added with a snicker. Bokuto grinned and ran his normal arm through his hair.

“What can I say? Ladies dig me. Hell everyone wants a piece of me.” He grinned.

“Apparently Kaori actually got a piece.” The four looked up as the owner of the gun store, Kiyoko, strolled in. She immediately walked past the staring Nishinoya and Tanaka and handed Bokuto a letter. He immediately opened it and a picture fell out. 

“Dear Bokuto, I appreciate your gift and will treasure it forever. Love, Kaori-chan.” Bokuto blinked and reached down to grab the picture. His eyes widened as he properly looked at it and he gagged, tossing it on the table. The other three immediately took the picture, Kuroo holding onto it so the other two could see. In the picture, a cute girl with a brown ponytail was making a peace sign, hugging a slightly decomposed arm.

“Hooooly shit.” Tanaka and Nishinoya immediately burst out into laughter and Kuroo managed to hold out before following suit.

“IT’S NOT THAT FUNNY”


End file.
